The V-Max IS Ugly As Hell

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"No way would I ever be caught alive on one of these shitty looking bikes."


We can rectify that situation ...
biglaugh.gif
 
Has to be from a bandanna wearing, toothless, illiterate, 25Hp Haa ha ha.. Harley rider.
:looser:
 
omg not again with the carb chains. Wasnt that like... Sooooo last year?
No, he's right, carb chains are so 2009. The hot performance mod now is replacing the stock power band with a longer, stretchier one. It gives better horsepower across the rev range, whereas the stock one focuses most of the HP in the top end. The best part of this mod is it's extremely tunable to your riding style, Office Depot sells dozens of styles for rock bottom prices. Try different bands until you find one you like.


What I don't get is people that have such vapid lives they actually bother to look up a forum and create an account just to "hit and run" with an insult. Really? Bike Night? No thanks. I've been to a couple "bike nights", expecting to see a variety of bikes and maybe something interesting. Instead, they're always filled with the Same Old Shit that Milwaukee keeps pinching out year after year, with dozens of owners standing around jerking it to the newest style of handlebar tassle. I'd bring my V-max, but I'd be incredibly bored since nobody wants to race, and I might get some "overspray" on my bike when some dumbass rolls up at 5000RPM in first gear with straight pipes.


Then again, HD riders can go through severe mental distress when they realize their "american muscle" or whatever sportster gets raped by a 25 year old bike from japan. In fact, independent research has found there are steps to this:

Step 1: Humiliation. The initial trigger of the distress. This is caused by excessive and unfounded confidence in their machine's ability. HD dealers pander to this, making the problem worse when Step 1 occurs. Candidates for humiliating a HD include, but are not limited to:
-Vmax
-Any non-HD bike made in the last 40 years with at least 500cc
-Most four-cylinder "tuners". All if it has a fart can exhaust from wal-mart, since HD owners are well aware that more noise is more power.
-Any English sports car from the 1970's
-Most Schwinns*

*Single speed versions may surrender a slight lead off the line.

Step 2: Denial
This is when the HD rider is in utter shock his FGHIOSIONDHWSAIUAH Ultra Super Midnight Deluxe Heritage Classic King Fat Glide Train was defeated by __________. This phase is characterized by fleeing the location of the race, and generally getting away from the winning party as fast as possible. People who don't understand this serious mental condition would call it "being a little bitch". Most riders proceed directly to the nearest shitty bar/cheezy burger joint that caters to the HD, 500 mile/year, poser crowd, and proceed to tell their friends about how they just totally smoked _________. This sort of reverse-truth telling helps to soothe the bruised ego, and the approval of his compatriots aids in the recovery of this trying time. There has been speculation about setting up a sympathy fund for the owners of these establishments, but it was determined that they do just fine, since HD riders by nature are willing to pay top dollar for absolute shit. If they have no problem dropping $20k on a $6k bike, you can easily sell them a 3 day old microwave hamburger and warm can of beer for $20 as long as it's called the "Harley Combo".

Step 3: Retaliation
Sometimes, feeding a reverse-truth story to as many like-minded individuals as possible isn't enough to fully recover. With the advent of the internet and forums for every interest imaginable, it's much easier to seek sympathy and approval from much larger numbers of people. Still, even hundreds of Harley-Davidson (tm) enthusiasts agreeing that ________ totally sucks and that HD is unquestionably the best means of transportation ever invented, the afflicted individual still can't resolve the issue internally. When this happens, they attempt some form of retaliation. Again, the internet makes this incredibly convenient and easy, and there's almost sure to be a community for _________ you can go voice your opinions on, mainly that _________ sucks and HD is the best. This gives the individual an immense sense of daring and accomplishment, as the Harley-Davidson (tm) Officially Licensed and Endorsed(C) Lifestyle thrives on such feats of "bad-ass" behavior. This not only lands a crippling blow to the owners of ________, but also fully restores faith that HD did not, in fact, drop a roofie in the sales room coffee pot and sneak it up the poop chute.

It's a complex disease, and the full implications and long term effects are not yet known. However, as fellow motorcyclists, we have a duty to spread awareness of this debilitating disease that is souring the spirits of fat, balding mid-life crisis males everywhere, already in a sour mood since they couldn't afford a 42 foot twin V8 cigarette boat and had to settle for a motorcycle. Do your part, smoke a HD whenever you see one. It requires virtually no effort on your part, and will encourage other riders and motorists who see it to spread the word. Dr. Phil, in collaboration with the Mod Monkey Board of Motorcycle Sciences, will stipend you $5 for each confirmed case of awareness-spreading you sow, to be put toward increasing your Vmax's ability to spread awareness by being faster.
 
:ummm:Id like to see a picture of his significant other.:rofl_200:
 
Maybe he was not able to read or understand it.
See I told you your English was far from being the worst :rofl_200:

Kidding my friend :eusa_dance:

You are talikng with "CODENAME KIDDO" hahaha :rofl_200:

Stay warnned!
I have a wikileaks from Jon that I will not hesitate to use against any personal threat :rofl_200:
 
lavon74 has not made any friends yet... :rofl_200:I Wonder Why???????:ummm:
 
I am of the opinion that both are good bikes; each excels in it's own way.

A Harley is good for hauling around a heavy load of chrome & leather luggage.
Virtually every modification the Harley rider wants; makes his "already slow" bike slower.


The V Max is good for "hauling ass"!
Virtually every modification the V Max rider wants, makes his "already fast" bike faster.

Would you rather ride a hog or a race horse?

:rofl_200:

Jester 42
 

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