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Yeah, I saw that linked somewhere else, pretty funny, if a bit profane. He should be a copy writer on "Mad Men." if it's half the machine he claims, it is a 'sleeper.'
 
If I see him cruisn the neighbor hood, I would get the security camera rolling and start packin my heat........
 
We got smoked by (I believe) a Skyline a couple summers ago on the highway. We were booking along at 90 or so in the left lane, saw a car coming up FAST , scooted over to the middle. He pulled up next to up, looked over, I head a whoosh of a turbo and it vanished. Dropping to fourth and matting the Max didn't even start to reel him back in. Buddy with a R6 kept on it longer, but he never even got close either.

90% of the "tuners" out there may just be wal-mart fart cans and K&N air filters, but there are a couple that actually haul-ass....don't be too cocky with them. Though dusting some tool in a Civic with a farty exhaust never gets old.
 
I'm glad he live where he does. Imagine having him next door? Your daughter's boyfriend? He's funny, but a real piece of work. Back to happy thoughts....lol
Steve-o
 
This is singlehandedly the greatest craigslist ad I have ever written. If I win the lottery tonight, this guy is getting double what he asked for just for making me laugh so hysterically
 
hes either a tool, or a genius to make ya laugh and look at the ad!
 
all I can say is wow! a bible thumper he's not. Car looks like a beater.Must be he thinks if he says fuck 153 times someone will think its really bad ass.
 
lol, I love how he spins the negatives

Quote "Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither."
 
If God drove a Skyline it would be the GT-R . HUGE difference between the two! Talk about a line of funny BS! lmao
Mike
 
Couldn't read the entire ad. Believe the fellow was on an acid trip or something when he wrote the ad.....couldn't take it seriously......ridiculous amount of langauge:rofl_200:
 
He has a profane talent for copywriting, I bet he gave his English teachers fits. "Object to swearing? Terrorists don't swear, now we know where you stand, M-F'er!"
 
I think he wrote this to....Bike for sale

What kind of bike? I don't know, I'm not a bike scientist. What I am though is a manly guy looking to sell his bike. This bike is made out of metal and kick ass spokes. The back reflector was taken off, but if you think that deters me from riding at night, you're way wrong. I practiced ninja training in Japan's mount Fuji for 5 years and the first rule they teach about ninja biking is that back reflectors let the enemy know where you are. Not having a rear reflector is like saying "FUCK YOU CAR, JUST TRY AND FIND ME".

The bike says Giant on the side because it's referring to my junk, but rest assured even if you have tiny junk that Giant advertisement is going to remain right where it is. I bought this bike for 300 dollars from a retired mercenary that fought in both World War 1 and World War 2 and had his right arm bitten off by a shark in the Phillipines while stationed there as a shark handler. When he sold it to me I had to arm wrestle him for the honor to buy it. I broke his arm in 7 places when I did. He was so impressed with me he offered me to be his son but I thought that was sissy shit so I said no way.

The bike has some rusted screws, but that just shows how much of a bad ass you are. Everyone knows rusted screws on a bike means that you probably drove it underwater and that's bad ass in itself. Those screws can be replaced with shiny new ones, but if you're going to go to that trouble why not just punch yourself in the balls since you're probably a dickless lizard who doesn't like to look intimidating.

The bike is for men because the seat is flat or some shit and not shaped like a dildo. If you like flat seated bikes you're going to love this thing because it doesn't try to penetrate your ass or anything.

I've topped out at 75 miles per hour on this uphill but if you're just a regular man you'll probably top it out at 10 miles per hour. This thing is listed as a street bike which is man-code for bike tank. The bike has 7 speeds in total:

Gear 1 - Sissy Gear
Gear 2 - Less Sissy Gear
Gear 3 - Least Sissy Gear
Gear 4 - Boy Gear
Gear 5 - Pre-teen Boy Gear
Gear 6 - Manly Gear
Gear 7 - Big Muscles Gear
I only like gear 6 and 7 to be honest.

Additionally, this tool of all immense men comes with a gigantic lock to keep it secure. The lock is the size of a bull's testicles and tells people you don't fuck around with locking up your bike tank. It tells would-be-thieves "Hey asshole, touch this bike and I'll appear from the bushes ready to club you with a two-by-four".

Bike is for 150 OBO (and don't give me no panzy prices)[/quote]
 

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